There’s no need to panic if you’ve been asked to hold a speech at your son’s wedding. Occasions like this bring up the best in someone’s life, and a wedding will always be a moment of joy and happiness for the couple that has decided to share their lives.
The father of the groom speech is one of those moments when you are reminded that you are a parent whose son has all grown up and now has decided to enter in a life commitment. The support that you show and the implication of your time, energy and resources will prove to him how much you’ve put in your relationship with him and now in this occasion. So by all means don’t hesitate to let him know how much he means to you.
Many people avoid to speak in public because they are afraid not to say the wrong things, to do something wrong or they are stopped by the fear of not knowing to express what dwells inside them. Of course these are only a few of the important reasons not to do it. But let’s take a look to those that really make a difference when you choose to speak in public.
1.You are a parent
One of the main events in your children’s lives except graduating a college, finding a suitable life and making a career is their decision of finding a partner to share the good and the bad moments that life will take you in. When it comes to your children you’ll always find it nice to re-tell their happy moments that gathered you two together and allowed you to build a strong and deep connection.
Those moments that come from his childhood that made your day are now the best material to use in a wedding speech. You can take those memorable moments and transform them into a story telling that will be appreciated not only by your son but by the audience as well.
Other things that you’ve observed in his life and let you as a proud father and parent can be quickly mentioned in your speech, the difference for a good speech will be seen in your approach and the minutes that you’ve decided to speak about.
Don’t exaggerate with your telling if you are the type of parent that likes to squeeze some jokes in between the lines of your memories, make sure that they won’t offend anyone and that they are well-structured and fit the occasion. Jokes can be funny to laugh about or just to hear them, this will mean that not all the people present at the wedding will taste from them.
Advices are a good rule to go by even if they include correction. Strong and sincere opinions will bring light in the way you write and deliver your speech but at the same time will build your way into a great and remarkable performance where people will be thrilled to want to hear more from you.
Past relationship are not a great part to go by, at a wedding speech, they might offend the bride and by doing so, the groom as well. What once was should stay in the past, since the present is what links the couple.You can find something suitable to say about the bride as well. Ignoring her will leave you with some negative remarks.
Keep in mind that maybe half of the guests that came at this wedding are invited by the bride and her family and mainly at occasions like these people came to see the couple and to celebrate their union together. The basic line is to say a few encouraging words about the couple and share some of your knowledge that helped you through living a life of marriage. Not only that your words will be taken into consideration but they will remain on their minds and hearts to follow. Great advices have saved many across the time and have gained lives.
As a parent you’ll always have something to say about your child so go for it because no one will know your child better than yourself and the bride will have her time to discover what a great guy she chose to marry to.
2.Avoid the fake impressions
People that have already been to many weddings will have their experiences as spectators where they’ve learned from seeing things or they have learned things as speakers. The bottom line is that they’ve learned that not all their thoughts will be checked and confirmed.
Many times the reality can be different. Let’s take for example those cases of speakers that think that since they are in this position, people will have to indulge them and listen to them for fifteen and in some cases even more minutes. The results in such cases are wrong and many times they will see by themselves how people around them are losing their patience and they start to talk.
It is a true fact that they first seconds from a man’s speech are the most crucial seconds that one can have as a speaker. In those few seconds people are adapting not only with your style, the message of your speech, with you as a person, but they are starting to make some connection. For example, the first few seconds involve drawing attention and keeping the audience motivated to want to hear you more.
Your message will be first transmitted and if you gain their trust they will understand you and even find themselves or their children in the situations that you’ve decided to present. They will quickly notice your involvement measured usually by the fact that you know what to say and what to do. This part is usually established early, and when I say early I mean a few weeks early.
After you’ve finished editing your speech a great exercise that will reduce the fear of speaking in front and the emotions as well is starting right away with rehearsal. Practice will give you the necessary time to get accustomed with the idea of delivering a groom’s father wedding speech, but at the same time with finding your own rhythm to go by.
Another trap that is linked with your message is the time frame that is usually in the case of the father of the groom speech comprised of four or five minutes at least. In this minutes make sure not to bore the guests with too many details or by rambling because you’ve forgot some parts of your speech. Keep it short and pause between sentences this will allow you to refresh your topics of discussion but you’ll give time for the words to settle into their hearts.
Don’t start to prepare for your speech with a night before the big day, you won’t have time to practice and this many times has led to a total disaster. If you don’t have the experience of speaking in front of a public then it’s more likely that you’ll lose yourself in the train of your thoughts not to say that you’ll panic or the overflow of emotion will be so high that you’ll freeze without any word coming out of your mouth.
Whatever you put in your wedding speech,make sure that is 100% authentic and original. The best way to get this through is to consult with your wife if she has a few words to say as well and make sure that you’re not telling the same story twice. It is for the best if you use known mottos, verses of a song, poems or even quotes to find those that coincide with the central theme of your message. People have been to weddings and they hear quite a lot of mottos or quotes or other creative ideas that were just repeating. The best way is to find something that will amaze everyone and that will speak to the hearts of the newlyweds.
By being creative and original, people will see and understand that you have not faked everything that you are sincere and you’ve poured yourself in your creation. People are very interested and love to hear something new and innovative, so by being yourself and by using your own style you draw attention for sure and you’ll be well appreciated and received as a speaker.
3. Be a good observer
A great speaker is a speaker that can relate to the people that he is addressing to. A great speaker always transforms everything into the art of telling, making those that hear him emotionally connected with what he is saying.
Yet he will not stand in front of an audience to finish his speech if he will notice that the people are becoming anxious to see, hear or do something else, he will first take the pulse of the crowd and then decide on the line of his approach.
Even if the public that is present at a wedding is very various and many of them know you by your name, you should always think of topics that are linked with your son’s wedding and his bride that will capture their attention and make them relate to what you are transmitting.
Practicing will make you stronger and confident on yourself and you’ll easily observe the pattern of the public and how to maintain their attention. Your mimics, your gestures, your body language and even the tone of your voice will make them feel drawn to you and want to listen more of what you are sharing.
A great observer will always know when to end and when to pause but he will quickly adapt to the various circumstances that can appear at a wedding. Each situation is different but one thing is sure: the more you practice what you’ve written in your father of the groom wedding speech the more you are starting to live the words and fulfill the reality of acting, thinking and being a successful speaker. Your attitude in the whole writing area and later in your performance will make the difference, and will influence you in your decisions.
Every speaker has his own style, his unique mark of binding words together and transforming the whole speech into something beautiful. If for instance you are not the type of man that will easily express his feelings then a few sincere words will be enough for your message to be received.
The structure of your groom’s father speech
For the father of the groom speech the main accent is always put on the son and later on complimenting the bride. Since you are the second or the third this according to any wedding occasion, you’ll have the opportunity to address a few short appreciations to the parents of the bride that will open the line of speeches.
You can add some thankful notes about their involvements and as well by their thoughts of complimenting your son. Then you should know that those guests that are present here have left their work, their homes to share the event. A few thanks are more than received to make them welcomed.
The next will involve your son and his bride and the ending of your speech will be in whishing the best to the newlyweds that will start on enjoying the days of their lives together. The toast is the last and your wishes can be significant related to their wedding, to them as a coupe or whatever you’ll find suitable.
You should find a balance in everything that you’ll write even in making jokes or addressing to people. A formal style is not the best option to go by since you are not in a conference room. Your son’s wedding is a huge event and your opinion and your attitude matters a lot to him and to his bride and the words that you’ll use will make the difference.
However, using plain but sincere words will definitely help you make a good impression and you’ll memorize them easier than if you would have used some words that are too complicated or elaborated that in the way of your performance you’ll replace them. Your groom’s father speech should be short, funny and remembered by.